artwork (above): Michelle Clamp
Medicine Ball
Part I
An alien race was guarding this sector
Regarding all planets with life as a nectar
Rare in the Universe, as rare as could get
So they came charged with detecting a threat
The mother ship melted her way through the clouds
All aboard anxious to see through the shrouds
And there in the open as plain as could be
A giant stood snarling as tall as a tree
The alien crew knew all was sublime
The wonder of life was evolving just fine
With reptiles in charge there was reason to hope
All of the planets life systems would cope
They popped the champagne and they floated around
Ice cap to ice cap such life did abound
Up came the sun and around went the moon
All were lamenting of leaving too soon
But protocol dictated what should be done
The captain gave orders to sling shot the sun
Soon far behind them was 813b
Sagan's Pale Blue Dot was all they could see
Part II
Never again did they give it a thought
Until HQ called them, their voices distraught
'You told us that all was ok in that sector
Now we find 813b has a vector'
'Turn in your data- return to main base
Your mission's a failure, your crew a disgrace
Or choose to go back and find out what went wrong
Find what's destroying that planetoid's song'
'Aye' came the answer, 'Lee Helmsman, all full!
Pitch left at the Pleiades, we’ll use them for pull
We have to find out what the vector’s about
Watch out for that asteroid, come about, come about!’
The captain turned on the big overhead screen
Light cones allowing the past to be seen
Zoom it in with a will, if you will Quartermaster-
Let’s have a good look at this planet’s disaster’
And there on the screen came the scene sans the screams
Dinosaurs perishing ‘neath meteor streams
Nemesis Comet came streaking from heaven
Countdown to extinction came ten, nine eight seven…
The captain called back to now distant Main Base
‘Sir, there’s dead dinos all over the place
A one-in-a-trillion big comet came down
Allowing the mammals from holes in the ground
The rodents took over and soon changed their form
Learned to make fire, began terraform
Then came the cities and wars after that
They found without wars all their markets went flat’
Base answered ‘Yes captain, that would explain
Mountains torn down and the acid in rain
Return now to Headquarters, your job is through
There’s just one more thing that we want you to do…’
And off cross the cosmos the captain did streak
By sidestepping wormholes it took just a week
They left behind medicine for 813b
Another huge comet shot into the sea
Joseph John Racano
3/24/16
The Stranger
He tapped on my shoulder
this strangely dressed man
And whispered to me
"You don't know who I am"
"But please Mr. Lincoln
you've got to leave now"
I know you're in trouble
please don't ask me how"
And just as I told him
to leave me alone
He showed me what I
later learned was a phone
It glowed like a candle
and chimed like a bell
That's when a shot cracked
and we ran like hell
Someone arrested a
famous man's brother
He missed with that shot
and would not get another
Soon with the stranger
in Presidents quarters
I learned of a Universe
that didn't have borders
He bade me come with him
to some future time
"Abe, I've seen your world
now you should see mine"
The room started turning
The walls fell away
Stars were seen burning
And then it was day
"Where on Earth are we?"
He said, "You mean 'when' "
Don't worry sir I can
return you again"
"Right now it's important
for you to see this-"
I looked down below us
into an abyss
I saw Polar Bears drowning
The sky filled with soot
I told him to stop
and I stomped with my foot
The forests as far
as the eye sees were gone
I said, “never mind”
and we kept hurtling on
Things he called ‘cities’
were sores on the landscape
Billions of kiddies with
no means of escape
“Where are the buffalo
where are the birds?
Where are the caribou
Where are the herds?”
That’s when he showed me
the smoke-puffing stacks
Kind of a steamboat
a train without tracks
“Oil refineries
that’s what they are”
That’s when I recognized
my childhood star
I understood well
This would all come to be
And that’s why this stranger
had notified me
He whisked me away
just as fast as we’d come
He flashed me a smile
as he left me there dumb
The very next day
a great army was born
I at the forefront
blowing a horn
We scoured the hillsides
destroying inventions
Even the ones made
with honest intentions
When we were done
we got off the last train
Made it a crime to
create one again
And somewhere out there
in the times-to-come void
The stranger –my friend
knows what we destroyed
Joseph John Racano
11/4/15
Heart of the Hadron
episode one
'Twas the Heart of the Hadron 2017
The janitor was cleaning beneath the machine
He couldn't help notice every time he looked up
The odd cobalt colors of this massive pup
The hour was late, no one else was around
That's when he heard that queer far-away sound
It sounded like buzzing inside of his neck
He dealt with a chill and then thought what the heck
Gargantuan though this Collider might be
The subterranean hole could fit three
The janitor felt sure that no one would care
If he placed a nylon rope hammok down there
And many a night when the mopping was through
The janitor dreamed of the things he would do
By climbing atop the great cobalt machine
He visited places not previously seen
Anyway, this one particular night
The monolith hummed and glowed curious light
The janitor finally climbed up to the top
And sat where the reddish light came to a stop
He thought he could feel imperceptible movement
His balance was poor so he clung for improvement
And that's when the 'lectric red humming began
A bright light from somewhere beam gave him a scan
He sat on the top, let go of his mop
and looked at the floor to see where it would drop
Bells started ringing, phone channels singing
and things like big springs did their thing, started springing
He clutched the machine for all he was worth
Somehow innately knew this was rebirth
He stretched out his arms and he clung to its girth
A bright shiny surface reflected his mirth
Doors all flung open and people poured in
Scientists didn't know where to begin
The janitors ride took them all by surprise
Evidenced in all their wild wide eyes
Rotations accelerated by the minute
A gaseous mist was his cloak- he was in it
Cobalt then red then to blue and maroon
In two seconds flat he went right past the Moon
Where on the dark side he could see all the bases
And all the surprised looks on all the faces
Cities and building and big quonset huts
Built for what purpose known only to nuts
Then off to Mars where a lovely red planet
Brought to his mind his first girlfriend named Janet
Oh but if she could just see me right now
Janitor no, she'd be like, "Holy cow!"
And off to one planetoid after another
Saying goodbye to his Earth and his mother
One last look back and then boldly go on
Perhaps where the Comets and angels had gone
While back in the hole where it all used to be
Authorities asked "Tell us, what did you see?"
But the scientists were all so caught up in the numbers
You could have got better info from cucumbers
That's when they noticed beyond all belief
The mop, like a horse stood there ready to leave
Glowing and bucking and ready to bolt
But who had the courage to ride on this colt?
Back out in space, the janitor zoomed
Out past where Horsehead the nebula plumed
The vibrating Hadron had put him to sleep
He now was the cosmos forever to keep
Joseph John Racano
[email protected]/03/04/2017H
Heart of the Hadron
episode two
Dallying in Space
When last we saw our hero he was zooming through space
Light speed travel took a toll on his face
But interstellar travel has it’s secrets, too
Cosmological cosmetics can take years off you
The journey got unbalanced when the janitor twisted
At light speed he was growing old before he existed
He had to make a move and had to do it right now
So he grabbed the mop bucket and it shifted -pow!
Next thing that he knew the stars were slowing down
Groggy as he felt he feared that he might drown
Outer space is not the place to take things lightly
So when he met an alien he spoke politely
“Hello, I’m from Earth and I’m a ways from home”
The alien replied but in a musical tone
The janitor was sure he recognized the song
And he was pretty sure that copyrights don’t last this long
Besides the alien was talking in slow motion
And juxtaposed with space the thing made quite a commotion
The alien just pointed three hands down the road
And the janitor took off again without his load
Far out up ahead he saw an onrushing mop
Grabbed it as he passed it and it made him stop
He threw it in the bucket and he said ‘ok’
Straddling the Hadron cross the Milky Way
Something made him look behind from where he’d come
There he saw a scientist who rode steel drum
Propelling it through space by playing musical raggae
His dredlocks waved around and he was smoking a ‘J’
The two of them maneuvered nearly side by side
Sizzling at the speed magnetic Hadrons collide
“Come back mon’ said the scientist as he took a puff
That shit is so expensive mon, you’ve got our stuff!’
The janitor looked over at a moon they had passed
And signaled he would land and they could talk at last
‘Ya mon’ said the scientist steel drummed and dredded
Then he turned around and saw where they were headed
The two became as one, their crafts weighed a ton
and they realized they had landed on the Planet Fun!
There were dancing children, singing birds
and colorful flowers that sprouted words
There were dinosaur vines, and Lodge-pole Pines
There was gold and silver without any mines
They found themselves surrounded by a people quite well rounded
who said the voices in their heads had kept them all well grounded
After much good merriment, they ended the experiment
and scientist and janitor climbed back aboard and there they went
Speeding through the vacuum of an interstellar highway
Headed for adventure searching planet, moon and Skyway
Perhaps the two would someday
take these teachings back to home…
where the Scientist would present it all
to the Hadron-streaking Gnome
Joseph John Racano
The Curious Story of the Chupacobra
as told by Joseph John Racano
Here’s a tale you won’t believe in
‘bout me and my best friend from Cleveland
We took I-Eighty, West to the 5
and headed down South in overdrive
Saw the lights and the tall dark fences
just too late came to my senses
Cut the line, paid the fine
chucked an unopened bottle of wine
With that correction, passed inspection
and sped on South through the intersection
Drove through the night, not a light in sight-
a perfect setting for a real bad fright
Could have been luck, could have got me on Oprah
-but I swear I saw the Chupacobra
Never thought life would end from something I ran over
-but there’s a chance it was the Chupacobra
Chupacobra, Chupacobra
Now try saying it over and over
Chupacobra Chupacobra
It sounds a lot like Casanova
Chupacobra, Chupacobra
I hadn’t had a drink, and I was sober
Some say Chupacobra is nothing but a fox
Ravaged by a mangy cross of rabie-chicken pox
But it doesn’t matter why or what
It’s nose was close and full of snot
It’s eyes were mellow, a real weird fellow
Its coat was gray with little spots of yellow
I saw flashing lights and I pulled over
It isn’t wise to make the Federales scold ya
And everything happened just the way I told ya
They flew right by, chasing Chupacobra
Which ran a bit like a galloping horse
But when questioned, I totally denied it of course
My mouth was dry and taste like tin
They were gonna put me in a loony bin!
Chupacobra bounced high, like a big jack rabbit
Once got close so I could almost grab it
The policia checked my pockets, but I was broke, dag nabbit
Interrogator thought I had a bad drug habit
I said three times, I told him no no no
Why don't you just let this poor tourista go?
'Once more', he said, 'just tell me-
what the heck are you trying to sell me?
You were driving, and you saw what'?
I said, ‘that’s everything, that’s all I’ve got’
He slapped me hard with an open hand
Broke apart his wedding band
I saw the fury in his eyes
But he was looking at the window quite surprised
And just when I thought my life was over
Through the busted glass jumped the Chupacobra!
No si’ habla candelabra
This was not the Chupacabra
Not some birdie from Palos Verdes
This thing had scales and was clocked at thirty!
In the commotion I broke the cuffs
like those old James Cagney toughs
In two seconds flat I was outa the chair
Through the door and in the cold night air
From inside I could still hear snarling
And a Mexican lady screaming, ‘Darling! Darling’
Never slowed down till I found the car
Which was parked outside cantina bar
The keys were in it, revved it up to spin it
Hit the interstate highway in a new york minute
Through the flames in my rear view mirror
I saw Chupacobra getting nearer and nearer
Remembered a sandwich in the portable fridge
(Ate pepperjack cheese as I crossed the bridge)
Drove all the way home and pulled up dirty
To my surprise, it was just 6:30
My friends, quite kind never asked a thing
My gal was mad, but still wore my ring
And me, I’m so dam glad it’s over
The whole monkey business of the Chupacobra
No more looking over my shoulder
‘Am I being followed by a Chupacobra?”
-Now every year around cinco de mayo
My friend and I drive North to Ohio!
JR 7/22/15
as told by Joseph John Racano
Here’s a tale you won’t believe in
‘bout me and my best friend from Cleveland
We took I-Eighty, West to the 5
and headed down South in overdrive
Saw the lights and the tall dark fences
just too late came to my senses
Cut the line, paid the fine
chucked an unopened bottle of wine
With that correction, passed inspection
and sped on South through the intersection
Drove through the night, not a light in sight-
a perfect setting for a real bad fright
Could have been luck, could have got me on Oprah
-but I swear I saw the Chupacobra
Never thought life would end from something I ran over
-but there’s a chance it was the Chupacobra
Chupacobra, Chupacobra
Now try saying it over and over
Chupacobra Chupacobra
It sounds a lot like Casanova
Chupacobra, Chupacobra
I hadn’t had a drink, and I was sober
Some say Chupacobra is nothing but a fox
Ravaged by a mangy cross of rabie-chicken pox
But it doesn’t matter why or what
It’s nose was close and full of snot
It’s eyes were mellow, a real weird fellow
Its coat was gray with little spots of yellow
I saw flashing lights and I pulled over
It isn’t wise to make the Federales scold ya
And everything happened just the way I told ya
They flew right by, chasing Chupacobra
Which ran a bit like a galloping horse
But when questioned, I totally denied it of course
My mouth was dry and taste like tin
They were gonna put me in a loony bin!
Chupacobra bounced high, like a big jack rabbit
Once got close so I could almost grab it
The policia checked my pockets, but I was broke, dag nabbit
Interrogator thought I had a bad drug habit
I said three times, I told him no no no
Why don't you just let this poor tourista go?
'Once more', he said, 'just tell me-
what the heck are you trying to sell me?
You were driving, and you saw what'?
I said, ‘that’s everything, that’s all I’ve got’
He slapped me hard with an open hand
Broke apart his wedding band
I saw the fury in his eyes
But he was looking at the window quite surprised
And just when I thought my life was over
Through the busted glass jumped the Chupacobra!
No si’ habla candelabra
This was not the Chupacabra
Not some birdie from Palos Verdes
This thing had scales and was clocked at thirty!
In the commotion I broke the cuffs
like those old James Cagney toughs
In two seconds flat I was outa the chair
Through the door and in the cold night air
From inside I could still hear snarling
And a Mexican lady screaming, ‘Darling! Darling’
Never slowed down till I found the car
Which was parked outside cantina bar
The keys were in it, revved it up to spin it
Hit the interstate highway in a new york minute
Through the flames in my rear view mirror
I saw Chupacobra getting nearer and nearer
Remembered a sandwich in the portable fridge
(Ate pepperjack cheese as I crossed the bridge)
Drove all the way home and pulled up dirty
To my surprise, it was just 6:30
My friends, quite kind never asked a thing
My gal was mad, but still wore my ring
And me, I’m so dam glad it’s over
The whole monkey business of the Chupacobra
No more looking over my shoulder
‘Am I being followed by a Chupacobra?”
-Now every year around cinco de mayo
My friend and I drive North to Ohio!
JR 7/22/15
Totem of the Orca
The sky gave a warning on that fateful day
with a crimson red morning over Marathon Bay
Where a large wooden ship was moored offshore
A totem of an orca on her bow she wore
The hold stank of musk and the galley of mold
But the members of the crew all dreamed of gold
Four hundred cubits and two hundred men
headed to sea, where the maps all end
It was said, there an island rose from the sea
so young that it still hadn’t sprouted a tree
Its gravel was diamonds, rubies and jade
created by heat the volcano had made
A breeze started up as we loosened the lines
Its cold sending shivers through all of our spines
The sun soon gave way to the moon and the stars
The sailors all dreamed of the girls in the bars
They slept on their backs with their nose to the air
smelling for smoke that meant gold would be there
To a bloody-red sky dizzy sailors awoke
The crows-nest on lookout sought volcanic smoke
The waves were now pounding with such mighty fury
The ocean became both their judge and their jury
With swells crashing down like an open right hand
the sailors -to a man- missed the dear sight of land
It was three days and later with the sea still a-churning, when
“Ahoy!” screamed the lookout, “Look there- something’s burning!”
From the many ill sailors, there rose up a shout
“Aye,” said the captain, “Mr. Helmsman, come about!”
An island rose up, surrounded by mist
“Zeus!” said the captain, “what sorcery is this?”
When the bow ran aground, it calmed the sea down
The captain sent scouts out and said, “Look around!”
The rocks they were hot, and the feet, they were bare
There was geothermal smoke rising up everywhere
But nary a diamond, and jewels, they saw none
“All hands ashore- you will search ‘til we’re done!”
As the last man set a foot in the drink
the whole bloody island started to sink!
Smoke became bubble, the ship turned to rubble
No diamonds, no island, no ship- only trouble!
“Why mighty Zeus, cause our widows to weep?”
-the captain and crew shouted out from on deep
“Spare us on our foolish quest out for gold!
Spare us that we may return to grow old!”
Just at that moment, the wood from the hull
broke free of the totem, a huge orca skull
And many of them did grab hold of that beam
(the many who couldn’t went down with a scream)
That's when real orcas began to appear
And caused the survivors to cower in fear
But to their amazement the great mighty orca
delivered them all to the pearls of Majorca
Those washed ashore later gave thanks to their god
-and also their saviors, the large orca pod!
Joseph John Racano
12/2/14
artwork: Chambers
The sky gave a warning on that fateful day
with a crimson red morning over Marathon Bay
Where a large wooden ship was moored offshore
A totem of an orca on her bow she wore
The hold stank of musk and the galley of mold
But the members of the crew all dreamed of gold
Four hundred cubits and two hundred men
headed to sea, where the maps all end
It was said, there an island rose from the sea
so young that it still hadn’t sprouted a tree
Its gravel was diamonds, rubies and jade
created by heat the volcano had made
A breeze started up as we loosened the lines
Its cold sending shivers through all of our spines
The sun soon gave way to the moon and the stars
The sailors all dreamed of the girls in the bars
They slept on their backs with their nose to the air
smelling for smoke that meant gold would be there
To a bloody-red sky dizzy sailors awoke
The crows-nest on lookout sought volcanic smoke
The waves were now pounding with such mighty fury
The ocean became both their judge and their jury
With swells crashing down like an open right hand
the sailors -to a man- missed the dear sight of land
It was three days and later with the sea still a-churning, when
“Ahoy!” screamed the lookout, “Look there- something’s burning!”
From the many ill sailors, there rose up a shout
“Aye,” said the captain, “Mr. Helmsman, come about!”
An island rose up, surrounded by mist
“Zeus!” said the captain, “what sorcery is this?”
When the bow ran aground, it calmed the sea down
The captain sent scouts out and said, “Look around!”
The rocks they were hot, and the feet, they were bare
There was geothermal smoke rising up everywhere
But nary a diamond, and jewels, they saw none
“All hands ashore- you will search ‘til we’re done!”
As the last man set a foot in the drink
the whole bloody island started to sink!
Smoke became bubble, the ship turned to rubble
No diamonds, no island, no ship- only trouble!
“Why mighty Zeus, cause our widows to weep?”
-the captain and crew shouted out from on deep
“Spare us on our foolish quest out for gold!
Spare us that we may return to grow old!”
Just at that moment, the wood from the hull
broke free of the totem, a huge orca skull
And many of them did grab hold of that beam
(the many who couldn’t went down with a scream)
That's when real orcas began to appear
And caused the survivors to cower in fear
But to their amazement the great mighty orca
delivered them all to the pearls of Majorca
Those washed ashore later gave thanks to their god
-and also their saviors, the large orca pod!
Joseph John Racano
12/2/14
artwork: Chambers
Two-thousand Crows
In the thrust of the day, early on did I meet
A vibrating sensation by way of my feet
I followed my toes and it led out the door
where a murder of crows made a thunderous roar
My dog raised his hackles and curled up his lip
I kept my eyes open and searched for a tip
The deafening sound came from just down the way
What were two thousand crows keeping at bay?
My mind drifted back to a fortnight before
when these very same crows had been noisy galore
That morning I followed their wrath to its source
The trickster coyote- with rabbit, of course!
But this time coyote was naught to be seen
And rabbits were home safe in bed in a dream
And yet here they were, loud as Lucifer’s choir
Two thousand crows cawing higher and higher
I looked to my hound who was still as a fox
(and wondering why I was out in my socks)
And that’s when I saw it, the curious tree
A Deer berry bush, and quite red, I could see
The berries were ripe and fermenting and such
surrounded by crows who had feasted too much
Drunk on the wine they were acting as fools
but a Deer berry vine has a strict set of rules
You can’t eat too much if you can’t hold your liquor
The crowd had grown rowdy and thicker and thicker
Soon they were making their spectacle heard
by all within earshot of man beast or bird
Two thousand crows, Oakland Raider fans all
At least I assumed when they punctured the ball
With many reclining their backs to the lawn
There they would stay ‘till awakened by dawn
Drunkards and winos, a black bird, a lush
One said, ‘Let’s go!’, and another- ‘No rush!’
Never in all of your days could you dream
so many disgraceful birds making a scene
They covered the trees and they lined all the wires
Soon they’d be out in the world starting fires
I could imagine the crimes and the havoc
I gave it some thought and I just couldn’t have it
I called to my dog, ‘Come on boy, let’s go home’
We’ll call them a taxi when we find the phone
But thinking it through I said, ‘I don’t suppose
a taxi has room for no two thousand crows’
So one at a time, and by twos and by threes
my doggie and I put them back in the trees
They’d wake up tomorrow forgetting it all
Perhaps I’d remind them (caw! caw!) with a call
Joseph John Racano
Halloween Voyage (of a Warrior Poet)
On the Fly-by I looked back to see
A sillhouetted figure of me
Made so by the harvest moon
that's followed me since may or June
In my hands, a wand leaking sparks
Especially bright against a backdrop of darks
Palms of literary napalm, looking for a place to throw it
and, 'whoosh!'- right on target, I'm a Warrior Poet
'Hey man, what are you supposed to be?'
Some freak from below, or a flying zombie?'
(shaking head) No, well, if so I don't know it!
You see, funny thing is, I'm a Warrior Poet!'
Thigh-high boots with polished brass spurs
A leather tasseled jacket, and my hat concurs
Slicing to red ribbons people wearing furs
Calling me a weirdo, me calling them curs
And onward through a night made of crisp October
People say 'shut up' but my words run them over
I'm dressed up for a party, I don't want to blow it
These are the voyages of a Warrior Poet
Joseph John Racano
Founding Ambassador
Warrior Poets Society
On the Fly-by I looked back to see
A sillhouetted figure of me
Made so by the harvest moon
that's followed me since may or June
In my hands, a wand leaking sparks
Especially bright against a backdrop of darks
Palms of literary napalm, looking for a place to throw it
and, 'whoosh!'- right on target, I'm a Warrior Poet
'Hey man, what are you supposed to be?'
Some freak from below, or a flying zombie?'
(shaking head) No, well, if so I don't know it!
You see, funny thing is, I'm a Warrior Poet!'
Thigh-high boots with polished brass spurs
A leather tasseled jacket, and my hat concurs
Slicing to red ribbons people wearing furs
Calling me a weirdo, me calling them curs
And onward through a night made of crisp October
People say 'shut up' but my words run them over
I'm dressed up for a party, I don't want to blow it
These are the voyages of a Warrior Poet
Joseph John Racano
Founding Ambassador
Warrior Poets Society
Escape of the Dragon Lady
A handsome figure in a silhouette
descended to the ground
clinging with black leather gloves
to a nylon rope let down
He paused for a moment as he hit the floor
ears attuned to sound
But heard too late and cried out, ‘wait’
He awoke in an alley, bound
The alley was foggy, his head still groggy
so he forced himself awake
Set the alarm worn on his arm
Little progress did he make
He lay there still in the evening’s chill
like any agent would
Flat on his back, going over the attack, thinking
‘someone's got me good’
Head near busted, his eyes adjusted
to the darkness of the scene
In the shadows, looking back at him
was the Dragon-Lady, eyes of green
She made it bright, dispatched the night
Struck a match on the bottom of her shoe
The bottom of a shoe with the heel of a stiletto
all of it so out of place in the ghetto
She used that light to then ignite
a slender cigarette
in a cigarette holder
that reached her shoulder-
-a shoulder so fine it deserved a ‘soft shoulder’ sign
The holder took delight in being clenched tight
by the mystery lady (no matter how shady)
made even more so by her vanishing torso
and the dark returned, as the cigarette burned
The return of the dark returned the agent’s spark
Freeing his hands was a walk in the park
But he chose to feign helplessness
Pretended to be in distress
for the Dragon Lady in the dress
she wore so exquisitely, with such electricity
Hands on her hips, one foot on his chest
she exhaled a smoke ring that bounced off her breast
“Who sent you?” she asked, but he was not forthcoming
She dug in her heel and moved down to his plumbing
He answered that nobody knew he had come
She tickled the fuzz on his chin with her thumb
“Oh come now, school boy, do you think I’m dumb?”
That was the moment his pager went off
It said, “Do you read me, come in- it's your boss!”
She threw back her head, started laughing – like this-
It sounded like demons or snakes when they hiss
By now, she was backlit by lights in the alley
Her tresses as fiery as Father O’malley
That's when he bounced up and grabbed at her wrists
But she freed herself with some kung fu-like twists
They suddenly found themselves inches apart
His lips to her lips, her heart to his heart
Breaths intermingled in the cool of the night
She whispered, ‘Why? -why must we fight?’
‘Do you not find me attractive, my pet? and
how many chances like this will we get?’
His radio crackled-
‘What month were you born in?
That’s nothing but Dragon-lies, agent take warning!’
‘Pull it together, were you born this morning?’
Just then commandos and swat teams came storming
‘Up!’ the man shouted, and down came a wire
‘Here hold on tightly, we’re going to get higher!’
With one hand she grabbed him, nails gouging like so
The other, the wire- and off they did go!
‘You love me?’ she asked in a beckoning tone
He answered, ‘Of course, or I’d leave here alone!’
She kissed him without poison lipstick, we’re told
He kicked out the pilot, and took all control
Last seen on radar quite far out to sea
where there isn’t an island- or could there just be?
Joseph John Racano
The Whole Dam Pacific
On March the eleventh, two thousand eleven
I finally launched my one slice of heaven
a thirteen foot skiff with strong metal oarlocks
and rowed it away from witches and warlocks
I stocked it with food before leaving Japan
prepared to catch fish and so that was my plan
It wasn’t enough that I brought my new phone
I also brought stuff to avoid being alone
There was Charlie Chernobyl, my trusty Iguana
and a milk carton filled with the best marijuana
I bought from Yakuza, a Japanese mobster
whose last parting gift was a still-alive lobster
And so off it was as we rowed out to sea
a lizard, a lobster, my pot stash and me
By noon we were too far to see any land
I cranked up an IPOD to hear a cool band
and just when the solo began to get strong
I noticed the birds headed off to Hong Kong
Tuna and dolphins and whales said vamoose
Something real bad was about to break loose
Snap! Went the lobster, and snip! went the lizard
Queeziness took a good hold on my gizzard
Soon a crescendo of sound came around
Not from the sky but from someplace way down
That’s when a fish shouted ‘evacuation!’
I fumbled my radio onto a station
The radio managed just one garbled word
It was ‘Earthquake’, we already knew from the birds
Then in the background, someone called out, ‘Mommy!’
And I braced with both hands for a major tsunami
That’s when a wave went right under my boat
We were ok, and continued to float
One hundred and thirty three feet, that was huge
It made storm surge Katrina seem pro Baton Rouge
But splash! Went the lobster and sploosh! Went the lizard
None could have saved them, not even a wizard
I never looked back toward the sea of Japan
I’m nobody’s genius but am a bright man
The wave had bounced off Fukushima-Daiichi
like Fonz used to do to his poor cousin Ciacci
I just kept on rowing ahead of the glowing
which helped me at night to see where I was going
And just when I thought I was safely away
Two giant creatures burst out of the spray
One was my lizard, turned into Godzilla
and a thousand-foot lobster, now a one-man flotilla
May day, oh may day, I called on the phone
Is anyone out there un-cesium boned?
My mom must be worried, I want to go home
The whole dam Pacific’s a nuclear zone
The End
Joseph John Racano
9/1/13
The Krill-kids and the Last Whale
'When the sun rose up on the very first day
a whale there waited to wisk us away
to a place in the sea where krill-kids roam
far away from the land, near a mountain of foam
On the first Earth night 'neath a sliver of moon
a whale dove deep to avoid a typhoon
and the krill-kids followed him, close behind
clinging to his flukes but he did not mind
As the first week ended and the month came on
I swam to the surface but my whale was gone
I was forced to tread water and my heart skipped a beat
when I felt a sudden comfort rise beneath my feet
The comfort, of course, was the back of a whale
and I was lifted from the water like a ships main sail
I threw my head back, turned my palms to the sky,
sang the first whale song- and thought 'How lucky am I?'
And on that very last day when a whale does breach
I hope a distant descendant meets him on the beach
with a hand-weaved basket made of fronds and kelp
and every krill-kid in the world, there and ready to help!'
Joseph John Racano
Hello, (Hello!)
I ventured deep into a wood
after dusk when no one should
And there I came upon a cave
whose dark abyss I dared to brave
Hello, (hello!)
It seemed a long way down to go
Hello, (hello!)
To where it led I couldn’t know
Bats flew out as I climbed in
They caused a brief, but mighty din
I watched them fly into the night
A crescent Moon back-lit their flight
Hello, (hello!)
An echo came from far below
Hello, (hello!)
from darkness blacker than a crow
The cave exhaled a musky scent
as I began a slow descent
passed wall of stone lit now and then
by subtle light of glowing gem
Swallowed by a gathering gloom
I came upon a chamber room
whose floor was littered, jewel-strewn
with bursting chests of gold doubloon
Sapphires burned with brilliant flame
Rubies danced and called my name!
Diamonds shone in shades of blue
on statuettes of every hue
Hello, (hello!)
I felt my fascination grow
Hello, (hello!)
My heart was leaping to and fro
I tossed a coin to hear its tone
It landed with a thud on bone
and all at once I came to see
things weren’t as they seemed to be
Hello, (hello!)
A growl came from not far below
Hello, (hello!)
The time had come for me to go!
Caring not to share such fate
just before it was too late
I scrambled up the cobbled stair
from deep inside a Dragon’s lair
Scaly monster in pursuit
I stubbed my toe and lost a boot
Now my eyes saw through the black
the staircase was the Dragons back!
Hello, (hello!)
I thought I saw two red eyes glow
Hello, (hello!)
Of all the morbid ways to go
I burst outside into the night
I spat and cursed and wretched in fright
I ran ‘till I had cleared the wood
and left that evil place for good!
Hello, (hello!)
An echo came from far below
Hello, (hello!)
It seemed a long way down to go
Hello, (hello!)
From darkness blacker than a crow
Hello, (hello!) Hello, (hello!)
Joseph John Racano
3/5/11
Eternity-Three
For but a split second in midtown Manhattan
Space opened up like a sheet of black satin
Revealing to none what was too fast to see
But what was for others Eternity-Three
An old rudimentary breakthrough in science
Marketed to interstellar rich clients
And now any civilization could travel
Seeking to mine or explore or unravel
This is the story of one such exploratory
Thus undertaken to Alpha-Centauri
When highly advanced biological entities
Noticed a gravity wobble from Pleiades
Using Eternity-Three’s new technology
ETBE’s thus intrigued with biology
Opened a conduit on which to slide
Crossed instantaneously theirs to our side
Seen as a flash from the borough of Brooklyn
Followed the subway to see where it took them
Everywhere pavement and no open range
Ant-like in nature the humans were strange
For all the advance of Eternity-Threes
There was no helping poor creatures like these
The Grand-Project Rector gave wave of his arm
In under a second the Object was gone
Joseph John Racano
©@JosephJohnRacano/09/04/2020
Artwork: annmarie- ‘Island in the Sky’
The Technotiger
With a few presses of a button, the colored tab indicators went off line and so a great experiment was brought to an end. Some 40,000 years earlier, a dozen mammoth carcasses had been distributed around Europe, laced with a catalyst for gene acceleration and offered to the hominids as an easy meal. Some 25,000 years later, the Adjuvants reshaped their weapons into farming implements and began to till the soil. With extra food came larger families, and those larger families developed specialization. Diggers, rock crackers, water haulers, planters, fishers, fertilizers, crop guards, seed collectors and storage monitors.
7,000 years later came the walls of Jericho, and civilization was born. At this point, the Felinians were satisfied their experiment had worked, and Planet Earth was removed from their regular surveillance rotation. Many generations elapsed and such planetary-scale genetic accelerations drew to a close in the Milky Way Galaxy.
With Felinians on their home planet becoming increasingly aware of the moral and ethical breaches in the conduct of their own scientific community, the citizens clamored for the sanitization of past outreach programs. The leadership had no choice but to respond by designing deep-space A.I. probes, whose capabilities were threefold. These giant interstellar discs each had the ability to visit and evaluate a project, and upon final determination, either disengage via application of a trans-atmospheric aerosol mitigant, or declare the project a failure.
Earth’s systems, once vibrant and graceful, had succumbed to ecological failure. The Felinians knew the hominids were not to blame, but rather, the blame lay with the Felinians themselves. This determination necessitated the planetary-scale program of bio-mitigation now underway.
The massive craft made its first appearance over the continent of Australia, pixilating in the night sky and purposefully obscured by the shimmering bands of Aurora Australis. Lowered from the center of its abdominal bullseye came a huge silver sphere, which in turn released a smaller sphere, each enveloped in a cosmic mist. At the center of the smaller sphere, several lights blinked into existence, each the power source for a different joint in the Technotiger. One in the hip, one in the knee and a third sat glowing where the eyes should have been. The object was released into free fall, and crash landed on the terra firma far below.
Rising to a cromlech stance, the Technotiger stood no taller than an automobile, nor longer than a city bus, but featured the barrel chest of a metallurgic rhinoceros. Dazzling luminous displays shone from its complex moving parts, mechanisms not borne of this world. Designed by the highly technical Felinians on their home planet of Felinia, Technotiger was perfectly suited to its only purpose- wholesale vector extermination.
Technotiger’s sensors picked up pheromones of non-humans in concentrations as little as one part per quintillion, and left non humans alone, automatically deactivated by their physiological chemistry. The last surviving Tasmanian Tigers went freely about their way, kangaroos watched curiously, and koalas stood passively by. But Technotiger devoured people and neutralized livestock, while excreting homo-reproduction inhibiters.
Technotiger made even shorter work of the Americas.
Air Force pilots sent in to counter this robotic intruder quickly found themselves at odds with their own machinery, as all jets were easily seduced by the A.I. of the Technotiger. Pilots were ejected from their cockpits, and malfunctioning parachutes sealed their fates. Shore bombardment failed when 16-inch ordnance exploded within battleship magazines, after first vibrating violently, to warn away nearby marine life.
Within six days, Technotigers gathered on the Mongolian steppes, and deactivated. Others gathered in the burning jungles at the edge of the Amazon. Still others converged on Central Park in New York. When the last Technotiger was levitated upward and back into the belly of the interstellar disc, the craft was obscured by Auroa Borealis, and pixilated out of view, never to be seen again.
Joseph John Racano
©@JosephJohnRacano/08/26/2020
Artwork ('The Ravage') by: Annemaria48
Portal of the Dragon
In the year of lords two million three
A world of dragons came to be
Albeit quite peripherally
Through amateur archeology
A dusty sandy curious lad
Was digging as he often had
A pop top here a bottle cap there
Dirt through screen and what’s that there?
An alien number chiseled metal
Colored like a flower petal
What’s it say, and what’s it for
On the morrow back for more
Soon enow he kicked a rock
Found some sort of large round clock
Swore a friend to secrecy
‘Can you carry this with me?’
Took it home and washed it off
Gold chips shone in water trough
‘What’s that sparkle, what’s that shine?’
It sat for eons in a mine
Propped it up against a wall
Braced it so it would not fall
Alien symbols bored them soon
Until that is, the next full moon
When moonlight beamed inside the window
Alien symbols changed within glow
I said, ‘look it’s turning- can’t you see?
Almost imperceptibly’
Something started coming out
First a whisker then a snout
‘Shut the window- close the blinds’
Thought we both had lost our minds
Years went by, we moved away
Made no mention of that day
House was sold and grew so old
They tore it down because of mold
Someone built a house on top
Funny noises did not stop
Found an egg inside the stroller
Called the pesticide controller
Took a hammer to the egg
Just bounced off and bruised my leg
Placed it on the fireplace mantle
There it sat beside a candle
House foundation liquifacted
Former drama re-enacted
Someone found the alien wheel
Thought of it as no big deal
June the first two million three
Full moon rose up over tree
Shone it’s light upon the clock
Neighborhood began to rock
House split open at the beam
Armored cars arrived on scene
Clock arose with glowing text
Out flew something like T-Rex
Chaos reigned and shots rang out
Things with wings flew all about
Someone brought a big flame thrower
All it did was ruin the mower
When the dragons tasted flame
Licked their lips and spat the same
Cities were reduced to sand
Far and wide was dragon land
Dragons are you know, immortal
Legions hide inside the portal
Now they’ve come for you and me
Year of lords two million three
Joseph John Racano
©@JosephJohnRacano/05/30/2020
Strange Time Change
I awoke this morning it was time to change
My room had already done a rearrange
The wall was a window and the window was a wall
I opened up the closet but it led to the hall
I slipped both feet into unfamiliar slippers
Every single window showed me different big dippers
Looked into the mirror and it wasn’t my face
It wasn’t even someone from the human race
I knew I wasn’t dreaming when the tea pot whistled
Got lathered up and shaving as my whiskers bristled
Picked up my inhaler and began to cough
That was when I realized the time was off
The sound came first and the cough came after
Long before I smiled came uproarious laughter
I coughed then a sneeze and a sneeze to a sniffle
Then in came the paper like a guided missile
Half an hour later at an intersection
I saw the paper boy and I made the connection
Time had changed but a bit off-kilter
And everything I saw was through a time-lapse filter
Had to think fast so I copied all the numbers
Bought a lotto ticket bet a thousand cucumbers
Million dollar jackpot fair and square
Stuffed it in my pants but the pocket wasn’t there
Spring ahead and fall behind
The whole thing had me time zone blind
Close encounter of the time change kind
Surely I would lose my mind
Combed the rainbows from my hair
Went back home and waited there
Poured some coffee in my cup
Time was finally catching up
Closed the windows shut the door
Lay spread eagle on the floor
Heard the voicemail then the ring
Couldn't sense make anything
Who invented Daylight savings
Surely just a madman’s ravings
Made a vow I’ve kept since then
Never touched my clock again
Joseph John Racano
The Candy Counter
Landed on a different planet
Streets were paved in solid granite
But what we’d never seen before
The tallest building was the candy store
Walked inside with abundant caution
Portals must had cost a fortune
Partial darkness, had to grope
Guided by a velvet rope
Looking down at yellow bricks
Flashlights on, a simple fix
There before us stood the leader
Three-armed one eyed candy feeder
Offered us a bon-bon cane
Causing some to act insane
All came down with slack-jaw droop
None immune within our group
Lights kicked on from floor to ceiling
Disco lights had people reeling
Then we took the stairway south
Chocolate foaming at the mouth
Cupcakes, goobers, raisinettes
Butterscotch as good as gets
Sprinkled orange marmalade
Licorice weaved into braide
Cracker Jacks and gooey stars
‘Nilla ice cream klondike bars
In the background it announced
‘Please stand still or you’ll be trounced’
And good thing that we stopped right there
A train rolled by that ran on air
In its train cars it did carry
Things a sweet-tooth man would marry
Cotton Candy conflagration
Blew its horn and entered station
Having seen enough confection
We took a train in the other direction
Thanked the counter, thanked the leader
Grabbed some milk duds from the feeder
Cleaned the caramel from my comb
Took the rocket ship back home
Told the story when we landed
Didn’t come back empty handed
Trick or treat for one and all
Make the trip again next fall
Joseph John Racano
photo: John Robertson
Meteor Cactus Shower
Lured to the desert by a night-blooming flower
I nearly met my end via Cactus Meteor Shower
With only sand beneath my feet, and naught but stars above
I couldn’t hide and so I tried to show the cactus love
The Perseids come from Perseus, who guillotined Medusa
Then they shared their light show with Cochise on Appoloosa
But never in a thousand years did I expect an hour
When I would get caught in the rain of a Cactus Meteor Shower
Leonid was Leo’s kid, the valiant king of Sparta
Who blocked the Persians path to Greece and so became a martyr
If I but had his bravery I’d not have had to cower
Hiding in the desert night ‘neath Cactus Meteor Shower
So bloom, yon night-time cereus cactus
Flaming arrow inter-actus
Thousand-year display of power
Night-time Cactus Meteor Shower
Joseph John Racano
Late One Night on the L.I.E.
a true story
‘Twas a crisp dark night on the *L.I.E.
About 4 am heading east, you see
My ‘68 caddy was-a haulin’ ass
(In those days we never gave a thought to gas)
A late-night driver barely out of my teens
And now it’s time to spill the proverbial beans
Fresh out of the Navy home from San Francisco
Saturday Night Fever I was king of the disco
Parents had a house out on East Long Island
Back in the day when phones were still dialin'
The stars shone bright and the air was clear
1976, yeah -that was the year
It was cold dark and lonely with the road wide open
Getting to a warm clean bed I was hopin’
In the rear view mirror I glanced at the horizon
Saw a lot of blinking lights, which was quite surprisin’
Pedal to the metal, I let the big block ride
My 472 ate up the 495
Proud as a peacock I looked back in the mirror
But the yellow blinking lights were now a whole lot nearer!
Police zoomed past and they told me to stop
I pulled the hell over and I looked at the cop
‘Stay there’ said the megaphone and they took off
I sat there for a moment at total loss
Glancing in the mirror I saw once again
This time a hundred thousand lights my friend
In arrow formation and peculiar way
Flashing lights and silence were the order of the day
And buried deep within this fighter squadron formation
A semi with a flat-bed carried secret information
Followed by more cops doing over 120
I only got a glimpse but what I saw was plenty!
I waited ‘till the squadron opened up some distance
Let the caddy roll at curiosity’s insistence
At closest approach I saw I suppose
Beneath the flapping tarp several engines exposed
It seemed to be a spaceship extraterrestrial in nature
Headed out to Brookhaven to meet the legislature
But fast as I was going -and it must have been 120
They left me in the dust no doubt up to something funny
They took it to the lab and tinkered with its gravity
To use it as a weapon or some form of our depravity
When the people in the sky were finished and amused
They drove it back from whence it came so it wouldn’t be abused
Joseph John Racano
*Long Island Expressway
The Black Hole
Peering through the darkness toward the cosmic soul
My telescope red-radioed a big black hole
Bigger than a bread box but smaller than a god
It made the Horse Head nebulae look all the much less odd
I contacted authorities by faxing them a scan
To get the guys from Space-X to formulate a plan
A plan to build a rocket ship that ran on neon light
(In theory using neon fuel would serve to keep the rocket cool)
Through wind and weather, it came together
We used what tools we had
Within a year the end was near
The ship sat on the pad
I got a call from Elon Musk
He said the ship would launch at dusk
Mechanics rolled up cardboard mats
Ground crew all wore tin foil hats
The moon rose up, we counted down
Liftoff at the stroke of sundown
Streak of light into the night
Systems go it all worked right
At four we hit the worm-hole door
Our space suits leaking on the floor
By five we’d left the human hive
Then pitch and yaw but still alive
After that was just a blur
Until we heard a Martian slur
They don’t take kindly to our kind
Left those antennae-heads behind
Turbulence and sickening drops
Out the wormhole spaceship pops
And there it was in all its’ glory
Spinning hole please tell your story
“Well” he said, as he cleared his throat
“Tell Mr. Musk I really like his boat.
The neon drive is a novel idea
Now try some of this in here and in here”
We instantly went into spin
It was easier to see out than it was to see in
We started going back in time
Was that my mom singing nursery rhyme?
We ricocheted around the hole
And saw into the cosmic soul
All events through space and time
Before my eyes and wholly mine
Dinosaurs were there among us
As were three ships of Chris Columbus
Holy crosses, midget tosses
Dead-end jobs with lousy bosses
People trying to cross the border
Fishes flopping out of water
Lions on the Serengeti
Light beams stretched out like spaghetti
“That’s it now, your time is up”
said Big Black Hole to frightened pup
And just like that, time jerked our rope
And I was right back looking through my telescope
Joseph John Racano
Festus and the Martian Bible
Festus found a bible in a meteorite
It crashed into the jungle on a clear dark night
Encased inside asbestos it was saved from burning
Slicing through the atmosphere as Earth was turning
With many similarities to one on Earth
The angry red planet gave this bible birth
And as the smoking meteor was cooling down
A local found the book and he began to frown
‘If you eat the fruit that was forbidden thee
You’ll terraform the planet and destroy the sea’
And true to form it soon became the norm to see
Red planet took a beating on a heating spree
But just before the final chimpanzee had died
Seconds after Mars no longer knew red pride
Doctor so and so wrapped up the book in asbestos
Shot it into space and it was found by Festus
It landed in the jungle and he read it through
And everything he read started coming true
The Earth took a beating on a heating spree
Crazy talking white men started World War lll
As the bombs were falling sat a tedious scribe
They say he was a member of a vanishing tribe
He wrote another bible, this one based on Earth
And shot it into space towards a planet's birth
Joseph John Racano
The Big One*
The big one finally happened at eleven - oh- one
The fireworks show had just barely begun
Lights were flashing, there was colorful smoke
Then the shocks rolled by and it wasn't a joke
People sat in chairs along the parade route
When the planet opened up and rendered everything moot
Everybody sitting fell into the abyss
1/4 mile down with time for one last kiss
The center for seismology was broke in half
The celebration flags burning at half mast
The ground sunk down and the sea rushed in
No one ever saw ol' Californee agin'
There was smoking and hissing and frightened people pissing
I went to withdraw money but the banks were all missing
The waves continued inland 'till they reached the Atlantic
The nation underwater left the patriots frantic
People loved a country that no longer existed
'Keep treading water' a voice from somewhere insisted
The only thing remaining was the floating detritus
And lots of hungry sharks who were delighted to bite us
Last thing we saw was the Los Angeles skyline
Tumbling toward the center of the Earth in a bee line
The hole closed up behind it where none would ever find it
And the Yellowstone eruption left the population blinded
Joseph John Racano
The Sea Serpent’s Wife
In long ago times in a faraway land
A tall castle tower loomed o’er the sand
Oftimes the tower was scaled by a boy
Risking his life for brief moments of joy
For up in the tower was held Princess Lily
Fiery tresses and laughter so silly
Bright colored birds sang their songs on her finger
Outside the window the boy stayed to linger
‘Why do you come here, you know I am promised
Sadly betrothed to the tyrant, King Thomas
Surely he’d kill you were you to be caught’
‘Oh beautiful Lily, you would be my last thought’
She grew much to love him as visits went by
Outside her window with birds in the sky
But one day it happened before they eloped
The tyrant King Thomas put boy to the rope
‘Father!’ cried Lily, I beg you to stop him
For he is my heart and King Thomas is rotten’
And so was her father called in before court
Where wisemen did rule for the marriage abort
And angry the tyrant called in a great wizard
Turned the boy into a sea serpent lizard
And every day after the rest of her life
Fair Lily was known as the sea serpent's wife
Joseph John Racano
Poetry of Dragons
©@JosephJohnRacano/09/23/2020
Artwork by: Jessica. Sieskja
The Dragon that Ate Metropolis
Tedious work all done for the night
The scientist closed up the lab good and tight
This was the year that he wouldn’t forget
For her anniversary he bought a 'vette
Wrapping around it a brightly pink bow
He fastened the seat belt away did he go
A single look backward and then he was gone
Unaware one Bunsen burner was on
It burned through the minutes and then to the hours
Filled the lab with a cascade of spark showers
One rode the breeze and was fed by the draft
All the way into the ventilator shaft
Then to the storage room one floor below
Mixed with a radio-isotope glow
Burned through a vial of organic matter
Eaten by lab-lizards making them scatter
Gecko insurance declared it a loss
Accidents happen and they paid the cost
Everything burned and nothing survived
All back to normal until that July
Third time this month that the neighbors heard hissing
Down at the waterfront guards have gone missing
Fishermen slipped on a slippery dock
Enter detective new kid on the block
Coated with slime so he scooped up a handful
Contacted scientist who took a sample
Scientist called him that night in his bed
‘Better get down here’ was all that he said
Tired detective showed up with his java
Scientist warned him be ready for drama
All of my findings point right to a reptile
Something too big to be killed by projectile
Kidding me right this is all a big joke
Head back and laughing he lit up a smoke
Sorry detective I wish that it was
But this is all radio-isotope scuzz
Enter the monster he crawled from the drink
Climbing a building and making it stink
Spitting a slime on the traffic below
Sending cars spinning and making them glow
Sat an old gypsy cross leg on the docks
Juggling stones and then reading the rocks
‘Mr. detective I have what you need
Put some of this in a place he can feed’
Mr. detective had nothing to lose
He poured the solution in both of his shoes
By elevator up ten stories high
Delivered the payload right into his eye
Slumbering dragon it put him to sleep
Tumbling down and rolled into the deep
No one arrested for there was no crime
They called Public works in to clean up the slime
Joseph John Racano
©@JosephJohnRacano/09/19/2020
Art by: RolandLatoreSpeed
The Wizard of Shondor
The Wizard of Shondor
Was wee but a child
When he brought home a condor
He found in the wild
Seven-foot wingspan
Magnificent plumage
It grew up so fast they
Soon ran out of roomage
It followed him everywhere
Even to schooling
None were a mind but
Except for the drooling
‘Round about leap year
His feathers fell out
Identity issues
With he had a bout
Had none seen a condor
Such horns on his crest
This bird was now massive
I thee do not jest
Upon graduation
The boy took his leave
Quite grown himself
From his bird he must cleave
Came dark of the night
He was half up the mountain
Seeking the shaman
Who lives in the fountain
Said a Shamanic voice mixed
With bubbling waters-
‘Who brings a dragon-child
Here to my quarters?’
‘Dragon?’ the young man was
Took by surprise
That’s when he saw the
Red fiery eyes
‘Yes, and a dragon can
Speak for himself!
You have been followed
There he sits on the shelf!’
‘Shaman wise master
Of this I knew not
Thought he a condor
A bird that I got’
Using a cane with a crystalline end
Shaman led both to a cave with a bend
‘Here you shall stay and get sleep for the night
Morning comes fast, I will train you to fight’
Soon came the sunlight that blinded cave eyes
Out into daylight and blue azure skies
Now he could see a great dragon he be
‘Wizard of Shondor, that name shall be thee!’
Clanging of swords hitting clanging of metal
Day upon day then cooked beans on the kettle
Dreaming at night in the dark of the cave
He with a dragon is nobody’s slave
Then it came time he would cast his first spell
Shaman was proud and said, ’you have learned well’
‘Lay down the shovel, away with the dust-broom-
In order to leave you must speak with the mushroom!’
The Wizard of Shondor put on a wolf mask
Howling and chanting and up to the task
And then the next morning the Wizard was gone
The shaman delighted the dragon stayed on
Joseph John Racano
*Another installment in the ‘Poetry of Dragons’ collection
Art: Twilight Saint at Deviant Art
https://www.facebook.com/reptilianscales
©@JosephJohnRacano/06/29/2020
Jason & the Blue Dragons of Planet Gliese
The crew of fifty argonauts
Left the world as astronauts
Headed for the Planet Gliese
On Jason’s quest for the golden fleece
The rocket ship they sailed was prime
Functional through space or time
It’s hull a tempered alloy steel
Seasoned teakwood helm ship’s wheel
In thirteen hundred five BC
Jason headed out to sea
Searching for a golden ram
Evil uncle’s wicked scam
‘If you want your rightful throne
Find the fleece and bring it home’
Jason’s heart was good and true
‘I will bring it back for you’
Weather brought them stormy seas
Saved by crewman Hercules
Lashed two trees with tree trunk arms
Did not let them come to harms
That night as they slept on cargo
Aliens found the good ship Argo
Saw the ship and understood
the Oracle of oaken wood
Mermaids sang a siren song
Hercules was made more strong
Graylings entry in ship’s log:
‘Made some changes in the fog’
Aliens shot back into space
Jason rose and washed his face
‘Something happened here last night’
Absolutely he was right
Argo went from wood to steel
Now were wings where once was keel
Jason now had thought control
Flew straight through a time atoll
Instantly they were on Mars
Jason casing all the bars
Asking each and every man
‘Have you seen the golden ram?’
Someone called out from afar
Darkest corner of the bar
‘I have seen the ram of gold
How much for the story told?’
Jason grabbed him by the neck
Then let go, said ‘what the heck’
Plunked doubloons upon the table
‘OK old man, let’s hear your fable’
A fire lit in the old man’s eyes
‘I know where the gold ram lies
I had him tied inside my wagon
Then was struck by a great blue dragon!
I swear to ye the truth be in this
Larger he than Mount Olympus
Reigning fire on the ground
I’ll not forget that frightful sound
Take your boat back into space
Seek a radiations trace
When your counter clicks like mad
Do beware the dragon’s bad’
Off we speared through ion storm
Nothing now for us the norm
Storms at sea storms in space
Passing suns burned half my face
Then the counter, click click click
‘Stop the engines,’ I yelled, ‘quick!’
‘Down there on that asteroid-
big blue dragon, looks annoyed’
Far below him we saw gold
Enow for comfort whenst grown old
‘Take her down, good Hercules
That is of course if you please’
Down we floated spiral fashion
Stabilizers kept from crashing
Great Blue Dragon came attacking
One good hit the hull was cracking
‘Herc’ I shouted, grab the fleece’
Then I added ‘if you please’
He reached by the snapping dragon
Grabbed the ram still in the wagon
I hit star drive, ship responded
Had the fleece and so absconded
Dropped the wagon off on Mars
Now the old man owns the bars
Back to Earth our dragster dragging
Followed by the big blue dragon
Lost him as we side-swiped Gliese
Gave next watch to Hercules
Landed back on Earth in jungle
I set off to find my uncle
Sent him through the time atoll
Big blue Dragon swallowed him whole
That’s the story of the Dragons of Gliese
How we stole that golden fleece
Pass it down add all you please
Now hoist the sails I feel a breeze!
Joseph John Racano
Another installment of the ‘Poetry of Dragons’ collection
https://www.facebook.com/reptilianscales
©@JosephJohnRacano/06/17/2020
Dragon Rider
Lo behold the Dragon Rider
He unbridled evil smiter
Floating on a serpent’s wing
Wearer of the ancient ring
Lo behold the doomsday slayer
Broadsword wielding blood game player
Stooping dragon mounted rider
Seeking out the princess hider
Strafe the stones and heat the walls
Thus repeat ‘till castle falls
Burn the drawbridge boil the moat
Later feed on char-broiled goat
Guardian of those in need
He who rides the dragonsteed
Not as master but as equal
Codes of honor foes of evil
Joseph John Racano
Another installment of the ‘Poetry of Dragons’ collection
©@JosephJohnRacano/06/17/2020
Dragosaur- Dragonlord of Time
Once upon an eon out searching for a dream
I came across a large device oblique within a stream
High atop sat Dragosaur, the dragonlord of time
Informing me that by default this strange device was mine
Shapes I did not recognize were carved into its face
Something like a dial aliens sent from outer space
Being thus illuminated poorly from the rear
Rendered Dragosaur a silhouette provoking fear
Puffing out his scales in such a way that chilled my bones
He spoke in dragonese with very deep and raspy tones
‘This-s-s-s time machine is yours to take wherever you would go-
But don’t unravel time by travelling back against the flow’
As he spoke the words he lifted off on bat-like wings
Disappearing through the night and off to other things
Here at center stream the time machine awoke to stir
With the bold tic tock of an angry clock the hands began to whirr
Then it started bouncing off the rock on which it sat
Where was once a dial folded down and now lay flat
Although he was gone his voice spoke over the intercom
Dragosaur said loud and clear, ‘All passengers get on’
Without hesitation I got on and found a seat
Door closed up behind me and we took off at lightspeed
Passed the moon and left a contrail straight across Pluto
I looked back and saw the line, a cosmic tic tac toe
Then the tray in front of me just let its own self down
Dragosaur spoke as before although he wasn’t ‘round
‘Choose a destination from the many on the screen
Universe awaits and there are things you’ve never seen’
I started pressing buttons flipping switches turning dials
Anything with colored lights I acted like a child
‘Do not touch the red one’ announced Dragosaur too late
Clocks reversed to seven that had formerly said eight
Then we started spinning and a-twirling round and round
Everything went sideways down was up and up was down
Headed straight for Neptune we were just about to crash
When I saw the vanish slot and fed it five bucks cash
Dragosaur as did before came o’er the intercom
‘That was much too close this craft almost became a bomb
Follow the instructions up above you on the dome
Then make all adjustments to your seat, we’re going home’
epilogue
The time machine set down to rest and splashed into the stream
Doorway opened I jumped out and let off with a scream
What a way to spend a day it brought me straight to tears
Then I checked the time- I had been gone ten thousand years!
Everyone I know is gone, and everything I knew
I pressed too many buttons or I perhaps a bit too few
I jumped back in the time machine, to fix this awful crime
Off to find the Dragosaur, the Dragonlord of Time
Joseph John Racano
Another installment in the ‘Poetry of Dragons’ collection
https://www.facebook.com/reptilianscales/
©@JosephJohnRacano/06/14/2020
Dragosaur- Dragonlord of Time
Part II
Now I searched for Dragosaur, somewhere out in space
Not much visibility with asteroids in my face
Oort cloud clicking off the wings
I swung the craft, engaged the springs
Flying just by instruments I searched for red lights blinking
Homing beacon I was seeking- He would have one, I was thinking
Dimmed the lights as I passed Saturn
Viewed the rings, I love their pattern
Caught a glimpse of the dragon’s claws
Just outside the heliopause
He turned around with open mouth
I dropped the craft due relative south
Again there came that raspy voice
I answered back, “I have no choice;
Send me back ten thousand years’
He sneered the way a dragon sneers
‘If you need to travel back’
He launched a flame, ‘then follow that;
That will lead you back to Earth
Somewhere near Australia’s Perth
Head true north to find the ringdom
Stonehenge in United Kindom
Rings of time shoot into space
I’m Dragosaur, I know this place’
As the dragonlord suggested
Followed as the plasma quested
North at Perth to Stonehenge rings
Shot back through time as if on springs
And there I sat, back in my stream
Thinking it was all a dream
Until I stepped into fresh air
And found my family waiting there
epilogue…
Many days and nights came after
I recalled the near disaster
Excuse me now, I have to clean
I’m polishing the Time Machine
Joseph John Racano
Another installment in the ‘Poetry of Dragons’ collection
https://www.facebook.com/reptilianscales/
©@JosephJohnRacano/06/15/2020
Part II
Now I searched for Dragosaur, somewhere out in space
Not much visibility with asteroids in my face
Oort cloud clicking off the wings
I swung the craft, engaged the springs
Flying just by instruments I searched for red lights blinking
Homing beacon I was seeking- He would have one, I was thinking
Dimmed the lights as I passed Saturn
Viewed the rings, I love their pattern
Caught a glimpse of the dragon’s claws
Just outside the heliopause
He turned around with open mouth
I dropped the craft due relative south
Again there came that raspy voice
I answered back, “I have no choice;
Send me back ten thousand years’
He sneered the way a dragon sneers
‘If you need to travel back’
He launched a flame, ‘then follow that;
That will lead you back to Earth
Somewhere near Australia’s Perth
Head true north to find the ringdom
Stonehenge in United Kindom
Rings of time shoot into space
I’m Dragosaur, I know this place’
As the dragonlord suggested
Followed as the plasma quested
North at Perth to Stonehenge rings
Shot back through time as if on springs
And there I sat, back in my stream
Thinking it was all a dream
Until I stepped into fresh air
And found my family waiting there
epilogue…
Many days and nights came after
I recalled the near disaster
Excuse me now, I have to clean
I’m polishing the Time Machine
Joseph John Racano
Another installment in the ‘Poetry of Dragons’ collection
https://www.facebook.com/reptilianscales/
©@JosephJohnRacano/06/15/2020
Dragonlord of Time, Episode III
Starring Justin Nicholas Thyme and co-starring Dragosaur, in:
Pursuit of Dragons
Traveling through time is considered a crime
Worthy of more than a poetry rhyme
And here we had trouble with the space-time bubble
So we called upon an agent who could get here on the double
Justin was his name, consistency his game
Without him our continuum would never be the same
Investigating theft, he arrived before he left
Rarely met resistance, crooks were wary of his heft
Briefed upon arrival on this matter of survival
His notes though taken yesterday by now became archival
Justin, thanks for coming, we all understand you’re busy
But we’ve got problems, yes that really have us in a tizzy
Justin barely finished with materialization
Something he’d done countless times in every state and nation
Halfway here and half still there, fingers ran through graying hair
‘Can you help us?’ ‘Yes I can- gentlemen you’ve found your man.’
‘We seem to have a Dragosaur, a Dragonlord of Time
Bouncing ‘round the Universe, and that sir, is a crime
The butterfly effect has got us fearing for our lives
By the time we’re home from work, we’ll all have different wives’
Justin looked down at his watch and set it back an hour
‘I’ll be back by four o’clock, if not, it all went sour’
With a flash and with a whoosh he lit up like a burning bush
In two seconds reappeared, said ‘things are worse than you had feared’
Dragosaur had meanwhile set himself up for a pardon
Won the hand of Eve back in a place they called the garden
Adam was beside himself and knocked her photo off his shelf
By then the couple left Atlanta, stole a sled and beat up Santa
After that long spree of crime the Dragosaur dove back in time
Started training dinosaurs and sold them to both sides in wars
Not unlike what Ford had done with cars and trucks and boats and guns
But chaos in a single place could not compare with time and space
‘And that was where I placed a trap, and brought that dragon timelord back!’
‘Hate to have to squash his pride, I left him in the car outside
Dangerous he is, that one; doesn’t even need a gun
What I did and where I went, he went first to circumvent!
Had to double back and through, finally brought him back to you’
‘Splendid job you did old chap, no more of this Timelord crap
Payment has been wired by phone, now you’re free to time-skip home
Thanks to you we still have wives, saved our jobs and saved our lives’
Justin gave a flip of cap and leaving said, ‘I must get back’
epilogue
That’s the poem of time and space
Justin Thyme has saved our race
Dragosaur is back in jail
Ball and chain tied to his tail
Joseph John Racano
Another installment of the ‘Poetry of Dragons’ collection
https://www.facebook.com/reptilianscales
©@JosephJohnRacano/06/25/2020
Art: Lordigan at Deviant Art
The Strange Case of the Haunted Band
‘Twas a bitter cold day during the frigid heart of a New York winter.
The year was 1981 and I was living with my bass player at the home of his family. At this time, Charlie Ugalde was a close friend, but we hadn’t yet actually become a band. That would come later, in Florida, when ‘Ice’ was formed. But for the time being, I was spending my days poring over ‘guitar player wanted’ ads in the local New York magazines and penny-saver papers of the kind you could trip over in every homes’ driveway.
One such ad caught my attention and sounded somewhat promising, so I asked Charlie to come along for the audition. We drove on heavily iced roads, with my ’68 Cadillac coup deVille sliding all over the place, making for very treacherous travel. We followed the directions which took us further and further out on Long Island, until the neighborhoods gave way to open fields of snow.
The sun was bright but the cold unrelenting. I had brought along whatever guitar I had at the time, in 1981 that would have been a black 1979 Fender Stratocaster, I think. It was my first Strat, and I still play them to this day. After quite a drive, we arrived at an enormous property, with a large old house perched at the apex of a big hill. It looked for all the world like the place was haunted. Think ‘Adams Family’ or, 1313 Mockingbird Lane.
Charlie and I cast suspicious glances at each other as we divvied up the duties of hauling gear. Holding tight to a frozen black metal handrail, we made our way up a dangerously steep cement stairway, slipping and sliding all the way up. I was about to knock when the large heavy door creaked slowly open. I poked my head inside, basking momentarily in welcome warmth and there in a large entry way sat several people on a long bench. Each of these people looked stranger than the next, wearing heavy and frightening makeup. I assumed it was an intentional, and good-natured put on.
“I’m here for the audition?” I said. “Downstairs. Around the back” came their reply.
So Chuck and I carried the small peavey amplifier and guitar-in-case back down the steps, lives in our hands. We followed the footprints through deep snow all the way around back until we came to one of those large wooden tornado alley cellar doors. All was quiet within and we stomped to get someone’s attention. These doors again, also creaked open and an astonishingly tall Frankenstein looking gentlemen ushered us inside. I looked at Chuck and he at me, and both of us felt like freezing cold flies walking into a warm spiders’ web. We carried the gear down and placed it on the floor. Then we looked around.
The band was all set to go, very professional equipment and a cool stage setup. All the players could have doubled in a Lon Cheney-Bela Legosi movie from the 1930’s. It was an eerie encounter, to say the least! Then, a large man sitting behind a black drum set bedecked with webs and bones -and it wasn’t Halloween folks, that was months ago- well, he clicked two drum sticks together and -a 1 – 2 – 3 – 4.
The band was loud, the band was tight, and the band was scary as hell, kicking into a form of monster music I had never heard before! The closest thing I could compare it to would be the theme song on the Munsters television show. Charlie and I were scared shitless, I ain’t ashamed to admit. You would be too, and I was entertaining thoughts of the macabre, such as being beaten, or maybe even eaten!
I shot Charlie a knowing glance and started to back slowly up the steps. I went back out into the snow and a now driving February wind. With amp and guitar in hands, we two frightened musicians slipped and slid, and fell and got back up and ran to the car and fish-tailed out of the long, winding driveway and off into the distance. We never looked back.
Joseph John Racano
©@JosephJohnRacano/08/16/2019
‘ALIEN’S WARNING’:
ahdoen482m *pop!* garble hissssssss *crackle*….
“Thank you, our apologies, thank you for your patience.” (Insect-like alien with blue-gray skin or overalls suddenly appears on all screens worldwide). We know that you have been seeing a lot more alien stuff on your televisions movies and videos lately, and we are here to tell you that it is not a coincidence.”
(whispering from off screen)
Let me get to the point. Your planet is rare, beautiful and perfect for life. It is a jewel in the dark expanse of the Universe. Your company management, however, well… let’s just say your brand is in trouble.”
“But we understand, having had growing pains ourselves a few eons back. That is why we have come to help guide your race through a difficult transitory stage commonly known to aliens as ‘Fossilend’. Fossilend isn’t easy, as oil is a tough one to kick. But as the sky grows dark, the seas grow warm, food grows scarce, and people begin arguing over smaller and smaller things, facing change becomes easier.
We know you want to change. The truth is, you’ve been mislead since the beginning of the industrial age. It is your leaders who don’t want change. They’re on the money train, in the finest dining car and it has a bar and restaurant with pretty waitresses. It's safe to say your President and his administration want to put the 'miss' in missiles.
Changing to solar power, which the rest of the galaxy uses, is not in their short-term best interests. Left up to them, you’ll all be wearing galoshes and highwaters and living in houses bobbing around on Styrofoam foundations.”
(audible gasps and shrieks)
“We want to help you, but you’ll have to help us do it. Your leader, one Donald Lechtenfeller Trump (that’s right, did you know his middle name is Lechternfeller?), he is going back to the old Reagan era model of the Star Wars program. But not for the reason you think! There is no boogie man. The world is flat broke and everybody’s busy looking for the proverbial potato, living on TV dinners and such.
But we aliens- now we are another story entirely! Your leaders and their partners (Exxon-Mobil, Chevron-Texaco et al), they don’t want us in direct contact with you. They shoot at us whenever we enter the Troposphere. And this new guy, a total idiot who got money from his father for graduation when he never even graduated- well, he’s building this monstrous weapon system that shoots missiles, and they’re aiming at our alien Red Across (we help worlds across the galaxy) ships.
And he even has his brand-name on every missile he fires! So *crackle* p0p! Burst bzzzzzz ahi#@ garble *p0p* we are losing contact now. Our time is up &7y65! P0p! and we have to go. Please help us help 07wh@p0p! *garble* you.”
Signed, Roookesnever Shilderplast, Commeridian, Intergalaxy Red Across. Goddess speed. Mantis be with you- always. (whining sound like outer limits) *we relinquish control of your television back to you…..*
The Amazing True Story of Snappy the Gopher
as told by joey racano
Part One
Snappy the Gopher
It was another wet afternoon in a long line of rainy days, but this
one had redeeming qualities. For one, the sky was a huge watercolor mural, the creator having flung grey and white paint balloons against an azure canvass.
For another, the winter wind carried a warming sun.
Acorns crunched `neath our feet as I, a friend and my two dogs came to a stop at curbside, waiting for a safe moment to cross.
"Good girl, Tree" I said to my lady dog, as she stopped without
stepping into the street, a product of long years of training. As
always, I waited a good long while until there was no traffic at all.
Starting to cross, I shot a glance to port, where my boy dog was
sniffing something on the sidewalk.
"Whatcha' got there, buddy?" I asked.
He responded with a handsome canine smile, tenderly mouthing something wet and furry. He was intent, never taking his eyes off what turned out to be a wet, cold and seemingly lifeless gopher.
That is how we met `Snappy'!
"Put it down" I barked. "Leave it alone!"
He dropped it obediently, handing it over with a gentle nudge of his nose. I stooped to pick it up, and it was cold to the touch- soaking wet, and I was pretty sure, dead. I looked around trying to figure out how it was that this gopher came to be lying out in the middle of a concrete jungle, on a busy street corner, with nary a dirt-pile in sight.
I looked straight up. The answer was in the canopy of a tall stand of Eucalyptus trees a hundred feet above. Somewhere up in those heights a hungry hawk was probably muttering profanities under avian breath.
Then, the funniest thing happened- he twitched! This cold, wet corpse of gopher showed a tell-tale sign of life!
"He's alive!" I announced, eliciting two wagging tails.
"Good boy, Champion!"
Part Two
A Sleeping Bag for Snappy
The darkening sky threatened more rain as we headed back to the RV,
Snappy now tucked safely under the frays of my faded denim jacket. I was desperately trying to apply warmth, hoping it would awaken the seed of vitality deep within this furry bundle.
By the time we got home, the rain was a steady, thickening drizzle. At this point, I couldn't tell if Snappy was starting to respond to the warmth of my palm or if it was merely the trick of a wishful mind.
Looking more like a soggy pom-pom from the tip of a knit cap than a gopher, he lay still on the couch. I sacrificed a warm white sweat sock, using a scissor to custom trim it into a gopher-sized sleeping bag!
I kicked into `mamma-gopher' mode and dried every inch of this
creature who responded with a long, slow leg-stretch. An occasional shiver told me we were getting somewhere. We left him sleeping on the couch covered in a white custom blankee. As we went out for tea, the only thing lacking was an intercom and Sesame Street!
Part Three
Snappy Wakes Up
Upon our return, Champion was first to the creature, giving him a good long sniff.
"Watch out" I said, peeling back the white sock hopefully.
All was as before –except for the eyes. Those cute little brown b-b's were now wide open. This was not the same gopher we had left; stupefied by shock, a 100-Foot fall and hypothermia- this gopher was alive and alert! I poked his cute little butt and he scurried up a few inches. I didn't know it yet, but the rules of this game were about to change drastically!
Part Four
Snappy Gets a Name
There wasn't anything left to do but let the rehabilitated critter go back to the Earth, so I took the sweat sock off the gopher and pulled it onto my hand like a glove. This was partly to calm him and partly to protect me, from –you know- the gopher.
I thought to myself `how silly', because here I was about 300 times his size. So I swept him up in my little white mitten and walked him out into the grass of a field next door.
But –surprise- Snappy started, well, snapping!
And I don't mean little ginger-snaps, either. This 4-Inch long little
rejuvenated fur-ball was snapping like one of those 50-Pound turtles you pull from the swamps of Okeefenoke. If I had to describe it on an actual ferocity meter, it would fall somewhere between a Sabre-Tooth Tiger and Tyrannosaurus Rex!
I shouted, "This little #@!*! means business!
Hurry! Open the car door and get me that bag! Please!"
My friend jumped out of the RV to take a look and stared in wide-eyed amazement. You could actually hear the snapping! Snappy indeed. With no ease at all we got that subterranean pit bull into the bag and laughed hysterically!
Snappy, epilogue
It was now obvious that the rescue was turning out to be a `snapping' success and, love him though we might, we were ready for his departure. I opened the bag, turned it upside down and out poured the `Snaposaurus'(gopherus tyrannus smithereenus).
Snappy couldn't believe we were just going to let him go.
He sat a long time. He definitely knew we had saved him. Even during his feeding frenzy he never bit at the sock, which had been the `warm thing'.
I looked away a moment and where Snappy had stood was now but a fresh pile of dirt- just your average, everyday gopher den. But we knew better. This was the new home of our friend.
"Good boy, Champion!" I shouted, "Good job!"
Joseph John Racano
as told by joey racano
Part One
Snappy the Gopher
It was another wet afternoon in a long line of rainy days, but this
one had redeeming qualities. For one, the sky was a huge watercolor mural, the creator having flung grey and white paint balloons against an azure canvass.
For another, the winter wind carried a warming sun.
Acorns crunched `neath our feet as I, a friend and my two dogs came to a stop at curbside, waiting for a safe moment to cross.
"Good girl, Tree" I said to my lady dog, as she stopped without
stepping into the street, a product of long years of training. As
always, I waited a good long while until there was no traffic at all.
Starting to cross, I shot a glance to port, where my boy dog was
sniffing something on the sidewalk.
"Whatcha' got there, buddy?" I asked.
He responded with a handsome canine smile, tenderly mouthing something wet and furry. He was intent, never taking his eyes off what turned out to be a wet, cold and seemingly lifeless gopher.
That is how we met `Snappy'!
"Put it down" I barked. "Leave it alone!"
He dropped it obediently, handing it over with a gentle nudge of his nose. I stooped to pick it up, and it was cold to the touch- soaking wet, and I was pretty sure, dead. I looked around trying to figure out how it was that this gopher came to be lying out in the middle of a concrete jungle, on a busy street corner, with nary a dirt-pile in sight.
I looked straight up. The answer was in the canopy of a tall stand of Eucalyptus trees a hundred feet above. Somewhere up in those heights a hungry hawk was probably muttering profanities under avian breath.
Then, the funniest thing happened- he twitched! This cold, wet corpse of gopher showed a tell-tale sign of life!
"He's alive!" I announced, eliciting two wagging tails.
"Good boy, Champion!"
Part Two
A Sleeping Bag for Snappy
The darkening sky threatened more rain as we headed back to the RV,
Snappy now tucked safely under the frays of my faded denim jacket. I was desperately trying to apply warmth, hoping it would awaken the seed of vitality deep within this furry bundle.
By the time we got home, the rain was a steady, thickening drizzle. At this point, I couldn't tell if Snappy was starting to respond to the warmth of my palm or if it was merely the trick of a wishful mind.
Looking more like a soggy pom-pom from the tip of a knit cap than a gopher, he lay still on the couch. I sacrificed a warm white sweat sock, using a scissor to custom trim it into a gopher-sized sleeping bag!
I kicked into `mamma-gopher' mode and dried every inch of this
creature who responded with a long, slow leg-stretch. An occasional shiver told me we were getting somewhere. We left him sleeping on the couch covered in a white custom blankee. As we went out for tea, the only thing lacking was an intercom and Sesame Street!
Part Three
Snappy Wakes Up
Upon our return, Champion was first to the creature, giving him a good long sniff.
"Watch out" I said, peeling back the white sock hopefully.
All was as before –except for the eyes. Those cute little brown b-b's were now wide open. This was not the same gopher we had left; stupefied by shock, a 100-Foot fall and hypothermia- this gopher was alive and alert! I poked his cute little butt and he scurried up a few inches. I didn't know it yet, but the rules of this game were about to change drastically!
Part Four
Snappy Gets a Name
There wasn't anything left to do but let the rehabilitated critter go back to the Earth, so I took the sweat sock off the gopher and pulled it onto my hand like a glove. This was partly to calm him and partly to protect me, from –you know- the gopher.
I thought to myself `how silly', because here I was about 300 times his size. So I swept him up in my little white mitten and walked him out into the grass of a field next door.
But –surprise- Snappy started, well, snapping!
And I don't mean little ginger-snaps, either. This 4-Inch long little
rejuvenated fur-ball was snapping like one of those 50-Pound turtles you pull from the swamps of Okeefenoke. If I had to describe it on an actual ferocity meter, it would fall somewhere between a Sabre-Tooth Tiger and Tyrannosaurus Rex!
I shouted, "This little #@!*! means business!
Hurry! Open the car door and get me that bag! Please!"
My friend jumped out of the RV to take a look and stared in wide-eyed amazement. You could actually hear the snapping! Snappy indeed. With no ease at all we got that subterranean pit bull into the bag and laughed hysterically!
Snappy, epilogue
It was now obvious that the rescue was turning out to be a `snapping' success and, love him though we might, we were ready for his departure. I opened the bag, turned it upside down and out poured the `Snaposaurus'(gopherus tyrannus smithereenus).
Snappy couldn't believe we were just going to let him go.
He sat a long time. He definitely knew we had saved him. Even during his feeding frenzy he never bit at the sock, which had been the `warm thing'.
I looked away a moment and where Snappy had stood was now but a fresh pile of dirt- just your average, everyday gopher den. But we knew better. This was the new home of our friend.
"Good boy, Champion!" I shouted, "Good job!"
Joseph John Racano